Stages

The Kübler-Ross model (a.k.a., "the five stages of grief"), was a hypothesis introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross^[1] in her 1969 book On Death and Dying, which was inspired by her work with terminally ill patients. Kübler-Ross' hypothesis was that when a person (and/or their survivors) is faced with the reality of their impending death, he/she will experience a series of emotional "stages": denial; anger; bargaining; depression; and, acceptance (in no specific sequence).

I remember learning about the stages of grief in conjunction with some of my education classes in college.  We learned about the stages of grief in regards to parents who learn their child has an exceptionality (disability or gifted and talented), because this can be considered a loss as well.  I remember seeing this and thinking that some of the stages were silly and that I would never experience them.  BOY WAS I WRONG!

I read a book not too long ago by a woman who had studied psychology and knew a fair amount about the stages of grief, and then she lost a baby.  And she studied even more, and learned a little more, and wrote a book.  There is a whole chapter in the book devoted to the stages of grief and how she experienced them.  She also spent some time talking to those who may try to help someone experiencing grief through these stages.  Mostly she said that those who are trying to help someone who is experiencing grief should be patient, understanding, and allow those who are grieving to grieve the way they need to.

I think it helps, knowing that the things I have been feeling are normal.  It's hard, when one minute I can feel fairly normal and the next I will burst into tears.  And just when I think that I've entered a new stage, the old one will pop back up and rear it's ugly head-- and I feel like I'm starting all over again.  Over the next little while I plan to share a post about each stage and some of what I have experienced with each.  I will also include some tips for handling each if your the one grieving and for someone trying to help.  I hope these can be informative and I also hope I can make it through without bawling the entire time I type.

Thank you for reading and making me feel like the things I have to say are worth saying.