Wednesday, January 2, 2013

The Box and the Dress

If I could offer one piece of advice to a mother who has lost a child it would be to hold the funeral at the mortuary (or some other place that you won't visit often).  I can't go into our stake center without seeing a box, a white box that I hate.  The first time I went back was for stake conference about 4 months after the funeral.  we sat in the gym, a fair way back, in the gym, for the adult session and I wouldn't see anything but that box, at the front of the chapel.  All I could feel was my anguish.  All I would hear was my sobbing and my pleas for my baby not to be taken away.  I couldn't stay, so I went to the last place I had held my little girl.  I still only saw that box. So if there's one piece of advice I can offer it's that you shouldn't hold the funeral someplace you will likely have to visit again.







"I love you a bushel and a peck"

We have a new box.  A beautiful box.  A box that still makes me cry, but not a box that I hate.  I love this box.  I love the men who made this box.  I will fill this box with happy memories, pieces of a little girl who will live forever in my heart.  I will share this box with Little man, and any other children I may have.  I will treasure this box always and I will not let anyone take it away from me.  Thank you, Larry, Grandpa Stone, and Marilyn.  It is perfect.  And thank you Lawrence for asking for this, I don't know that I ever would have.







On top of this box rests another memory, one that is too beautiful to place inside.  One made by even more loving hands.  Ethne was blessed in a beautiful dress that my mother crocheted.  I had intended to keep it for her to have for her daughters.  After the accident I wasn't sure what I was going to do with this dress.  I didn't know if I wanted to save it for myself or use it again.  My mom told me to save it.  She said that I shouldn't change my plans just because of this accident.  So, for Ethne's birthday, my mom and Grandma made a porcelain doll to wear the dress.  I see this beautiful doll every day and I am reminded of the angel who wore it nearly 3 years ago.  I am reminded of that special day when a precious little girl was given eternal promises.  And I am reminded of how much I want to be with her again.  Thank you mom and Grandma, for your talented and patient hands and for the results of their work.


2 comments:

alyssa said...

that is a beautiful memory box and such a beautiful doll. when you see her again you'll never think about that white box again.

Mom and Dad said...

Thank you for sharing what has brought you some comfort. Knowing what has brought you some comfort helps bring us comfort too.

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